A Brilliant Idea
by zimra
Summary: All Nymphadora Tonks wanted to do was making Remus a nice, homecooked, dinner. But will she manage not to kill him, and herself?
1. Chapter 1

Hi everyone,

my name's Zimra and this is just a story i wrote. First chapter is not very long, but there is more to come... Oh, and please tell me if i made some grammar-mistakes, english is not my first language.

enjoy!

disclaimer: nope, it's not mine.

**A Brilliant Idea**

Chapter 1

"So how are things working out between you and...?"

Tonks who had been staring sleepily into her cereals jolted awake at this question. She glanced at the back of the short, red-haired woman preparing breakfast.

"You mean me and Remus?"

"Off course dear, " she said coming over in her purple dressing-gown to pour Tonks a cup of tea.

"I'm getting the impression that he is quite err... interested in you."

"Yeah..." Tonks heaved a huge sigh.

"Then what's the problem dear?"

"The problem is that we never seem to, you know... get any closer!"

Tonks played with her cereals for a while and then threw her spoon on the table in a defeated gesture.

"Oh dear!" Molly rushed forward, for Tonks had managed to hit her teacup with the spoon and shatter it.

Tonks jumped up from the table and knocked her cereal over in the process, so that a puddle of milk was now spreading itself on the table and the floor.

"Oh dear..." with a sigh Molly started mopping up the milk. "You just need some time alone. Together I mean, just the two of you."

"Yeah, like that will happen anytime soon within the bloody headquarters of the bloody phoenix!"

The younger witch took over the cloth and started cleaning up vigorously.

"Well how about this: tonight Arthur and I take the children out for dinner and a movie. Bill and Fleur are off to Hogsmeade, Kingsley is on duty and none of the others said they would come in."

"So?"

"So tonight you and Remus will have the house for yourselves."

Tonks stopped cleaning and turned around to face Molly who stood with her hands on her hips, looking rather pleased with herself.

"But he's not coming tonight, you said so."

"Well, perhaps you should call him and ask him to come over for dinner."

Tonks' face brightened and Molly smirked.

"A romantic dinner will certainly get you closer to eachother, won't it?"

"Sure as hell it will!" A wide grin spread across Tonks' face.

"You're brilliant Molly!"

"Well let's say I've had some experience..." With a mischievous smile she turned back to the stove.

Well, what did you think so far? Yes, it's short, but there's more to come. Please let me know if you like it!

love, Zimra


	2. Chapter 2

Hi everyone,

I promised there would be a next chapter soon, so here it is!

And Lily Christy: You're actually right, Molly and Arhtur would probably never go to the movies... forgot about that! lol!

enjoy the new chapter!

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Chapter 2

"Nymphadora, what a surprise."

The fireplace in Remus' shabby apartment had sprung to life and Tonks' head had appeared between the emerald flames. She looked around the room where Remus Lupin apparently lived.

That is to say: when he was not at Grimmauldplace or at work for the order. Just like Tonks he had spent very little time at home since the beginning of the summer, mainly because they both enjoyed the children who were back from Hogwarts.

The room was clean but extremely shabby with only a table, two chairs, a dusty couch and a patchy old armchair in which Remus was sitting.

He smiled at the sight of Tonks' head in his fireplace.

"How may I help you?"

"Well, erm..." Tonks' head blushed furiously, either from realising how shabby this place exactly was of from what she was about to ask. Luckily the green flames wouldn't give her away.

"Well... I was, I mean, I am going to prepare a dinner. Tonight I mean" she added when she saw Remus' questioning look.

"That is...wonderful news. I'm sure Molly and the children will be pleased."

"They're not coming, they are going out to see a movie."

"Did they decide that before or after you offered to cook?"

"I can prepare a fine dinner, thank you very much!"

"I'm sure you can. Certainly you knew I was only joking?"

"Uh... yeah off course..." The twinkle in his eyes made her blush even deeper.

"So what are you going to cook?"

Yes, what on earth was she going to cook? It had to be something so delicious he couldn't refuse, like eh... treacle tart! But wasn't treacle tart a desert? Tonks knew she could easily eat treacle tart for breakfast, lunch and dinner, but somehow she thought that Remus wasn't that much of a treacle-tarty-type.

She looked intensely at him, trying to see through his kind grey eyes into his deepest desires. What would he like best? Honestly, she didn't have a clue. Rare steak perhaps? No, it wasn't the full moon yet and although she was well aware of his change in taste every month, there was no need to make it that obvious.

"It must be something special, if you're thinking that long."

"Uhm, yes. It is very...very special."

But _what_ for god's sake?! Chicken soup? Too ordinary. Stew? Too much work. Borsjits? Too foreign.

"It's gonna be something só special, you'll never forget..."

Oh my god! Now she was flirting with him! This had to stop. She had to think of something, and quick!

Maybe not a bad idea to start with something that she actually _could_ cook. Ehm... scrambled eggs and toast? More something for breakfast the next morning... _That's enough!_ She forbade her mind to go anywhere further. The must be something she can cook, right? Something easy, failproof yet incredibly tasty... Something like...

"Seafood!"

Where did that come from? She never cooked seafood. Was seafood supposed to be cooked?

"Interesting. What kind of seafood?"

What kind of...?

"Shrimps!"

Tonks shouted the first thing that came to her mind. Shrimps were seafood, right?

"Excellent. I love shrimps."

Woohoo! See, she was capable of reading his mind after all! They clearly had some deep telepathically connection...

"Yeah, I thought so."

"You thought so?"

"I just figured you were a shrimp-type of man."

Ow, bad move... Why couldn't she keep her mouth shut for a moment? Better to spill the beans before she messed up this situation even more.

"I actually came to ask if you want to have dinner with me?"

"I would like nothing better, Nymphadora."

"It's Tonks."

* * *

Like it? Please let me know!

love, Zimra


	3. Chapter 3

Hi everyone, 

here's chapter three! no dialogue this time, though i think it turned out quite funny...

enjoy!

* * *

Chapter 3

The kitchen of number 12 Grimmauld Place began to look more and more like a war-zone. A huge pan filled to the brim with shrimps was cooking on the stove. In the oven was a plate of spread out shrimps slowly turning black and on the counter stood a large frying pan boiling and hissing. Tonks was standing in de middle of this, cheeks rosy and brandishing a wooden spoon.

Lurking at her from the kitchen table was an immense plastic bowl, by now only for one third filled with raw shrimps. An hour and a half ago, she had dragged it home after a very unnerving trip to downtown Muggle-London, running from fish-store to fish-shop in order to buy shrimps. She bought a little more than for two, just to be on the safe side, if one of her recipes wouldn't work out. Only when she came home, she realised that she had no recipes for shrimp, not a single one. She didn't even know if you had to cook them, bake them or fry them. Molly, Arthur and the children had already left, so she decided to just try all three procedures, hence the pan of boiling shrimps and the plate in the oven.

The oven. Black smoke. Oh fck! Tonks burned her fingers when she took out the plate and dropped it. After nursing her fingers with some cold water she investigated the shrimps now scattered on the floor. Well, surely they were crunchy... She tried to pick one up with a fork. The shrimp crumbled into tiny black fragments. Ok, so much for the baking.

After sweeping up the burnt shrimps and chucking them in the bin, she turned to the boiling pan of shrimps on the stove. Certainly they would be ready by now? She had let them cook for at least an hour, just to be sure. With a fork (a clean one) she tried to scoop up a shrimp from the boiling water. When she finally had pinned a shrimp on the fork, she had some difficulty keeping it there, it seemed a bit like jelly...

She put it down on the counter and waited for the shrimp to cool down, no need to burn her tongue as well. After a minute she picked up the shrimp with the fork. Or tried to. Oh, sod it! With her fingers she put the shrimp in her mouth.

It tasted like... wel, to be honest, it tasted kinda slimy. A bit like badly overcooked slugs. This description also fitted the white-pinkish mass in the pan. Except for the pinkish off course, she had never seen a pinkish slug, they where always more greenish. Not that pinkish was so much better...

Tonks flushed the slimy content of the pan down the toilet and immediately felt much better. Dumb-ass she was for trying to cook or bake shrimps. Everyone knew shrimps had to be fried!

When walking back into the kitchen, Tonks smiled happily to see the frying pan gurgling with hot oil. It was a muggle-one with a wire and a plug, that she had found in a faraway cupboard, no doubt brought home by Arthur. With her father being muggleborn Tonks was used to electric gear, but Grimmauld Place, as a pureblood wizarding house had no sockets off course. So she had heated the oil with her wand and left the wire and plug dangling of the counter.

She took a glance at the clock: half past seven. Remus would be here in half an hour.

Dashing across the kitchen to get the cutlery from the drawer, she felt her foot being caught in the wire and she knew it was to late. The next moment boiling oil was streaming down, narrowly missing her legs, and spreading onto the kitchen floor.

* * *

Yeah, cliffhanger...

it's nice to see that so many of you are reading my story. But please review, that's always nice to read :)

love, Zimra


	4. Chapter 4

Hi everyone,

Updating took a bit longer this time, because my exams are coming up in a few days and most of my time is spent reading and studying. As soon as all the work is done i'll have time to write another chapter.

Oh, and i'm glad that so many of you are reading my story. But i'd be really happy with some more reviews! So please, please... give this girl some much needed hope and cheerfullness in times of exaggarating amounds of schoolwork ;)

* * *

Chapter 4

At eight o'clock the flames in the kitchens fireplace turned emerald.

Remus Lupin emerged from the fire, dressed in his least shabby cloak, and stared around the kitchen in awe.

Dimly lit, only by a set of candles on the table, the atmosphere in the room seemed similar to that of a cosy restaurant. At one end of the long table two plates where arranged along with silver cutlery and goblets.

The kitchens counter, sink and cupboards were hidden from view by a large room-divider that Remus had seen previously in the living room. He remembered it to be slytherin-green embroidered with silver, but somehow the green had been charmed the brightest pink.

Remus smiled and walked towards the divider when the door behind him opened and he turned.

In the doorway, looking slightly flushed and sweaty, stood Tonks. her pink hair clashed horribly with the orange shirt she wore on her jeans. She looked young, lively and womanly all at the same time and, Remus had to admit; incredibly sexy.

"Hey," she said, "you're here."

"Yes, I am."

Awkward silence.

"Ehm... nicely decorated."

Remus, standing next to the divider, made a move to look around it.

"No!"

Tonks suddenly hurried forward and took his arm.

"I mean eh... Yes, cosy, isn't it? I found the silver goblets matching it really nicely, although personally the coiled snakes are a bit of a shame. Tried to charm them off though, but they wouldn't budge."

She marched him over to the table and nearly pushed him down on a chair.

"Why don't you just take a seat and relax. Dinner will be ready in a moment."

"Ok, but if there's anything I can help with...?"

"Oh no, you shouldn't worry about anything going on in the kitchen! You've probably had a hard day at work, so I want you to just enjoy yourself."

Remus looked up at the young witch who stood beside him, eyes sparkling and cheeks pink, and found he was already enjoying himself.

"So, I'm just gonna take care of a few last things, details really, and then we can eat."

She gave him a slightly nervous smile and disappeared behind the pink room-divider.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

The sight of the huge bowl of shrimps at the counter made Tonks clutch her hands in despair.

_Taking care of some details._ Yeah, if you counted the fact that she still had no meal prepared a detail...

She had to make something edible out of this grey mass, and well within the pressing time limit of five minutes at the very most! She walked over to a cupboard, careful not to slip in the remains of frying oil on the floor, and looked at the shelves for a miracle.

After the frying-pan-fiasco she had looked around the kitchen and decided it was time for damage control. A few well aimed, though not particularly well practised cleaning charms had taken care of most of the mess. The antique room-divider she had dragged down from the living room did the rest, but the sickly Slytherin-green color had bothered her so much she had spent fifteen minutes trying to alter it. She was pleased with the result however, and had made a top-speed effort to prepare the table and lit some candles for the right atmosphere.

Then she had hurried up the stairs, taken of her shrimp-covered clothes and found herself in a desperate search for something that was not: a) auror-training-gear, b) pajama's, c) way-too-much-so-that-Remus-would-think-she-wants-something-from-him, or d) dirty.

Eventually she decided on something simple, so jeans and a shirt would have to do the trick.

A peek in the mirror at her bright pink hair and the clock on the landing chimed eight, leaving her just enough time to run back into the kitchen and prevent Remus from discovering her cooking skills.

* * *

This is actually the first part of this chapter, but it was getting a bit long, so i decided to split it. There's more to come...

Like it? Hate it? Anything else you want to say?

Please review! (and make my day!)

love, Zimra


	5. Chapter 5

Hi everyone,

It took me a bit longer to update this time, thanks to my enormous load of study-stuff.

But here it is: a brand new chapter, ready for you to read and review!

* * *

Chapter 5

Nymphadora Tonks took a deep breath and eyed her surroundings carefully. Her four years worth of auror-training took over.

_First step: Analysis of the situation. _

She was standing in a devastated kitchen with Remus Lupin, the love of her life, sitting a few metres away (the two of them separated only by a lousy room-divider) and waiting for a gorgeous meal that she had to prepare in a mere five minutes.

In short: an emergency code red.

_Second step: Evaluation of the needs of the situation. _

She needed a meal. Or at least something that looked like a meal.

_Third step: Examination of the situation presented tools. _

She had no tools left! Except for a large bowl of shrimps...

Then her eye fell upon a white plastic blender, sitting on a far corner of the counter, half hidden behind an old toaster.

_Fourth step: Desperate times ask for desperate measures..._

Without further ado Tonks emptied the bowl of raw shrimps in the blender, closed the lid (she wasn't thát stupid) and pushed the button. A deafening grinding sound filled the kitchen.

Startled by the noise, Tonks immediately shut down the blender and the kitchen was silent again.

"Is everything alright there? Nymphadora? Can I give you a hand?"

Oops. She had forgotten to cast a Silencing Charm.

"No, it's alright! I'm done already!"

A non-verbal Silencing Charm prevented Remus from hearing anything else from behind the divider, so the blender was switched on again.

She let it grind for some minutes, in the mean time searching the cupboards for anything suitable for serving the dish. A pair of wide desert-glasses looked perfect. Tonks opened the blender (yes, áfter she shut it down) to reveal a greyish mass, you could call it a 'mousse' if you were very optimistic, with no resemblance whatsoever to the shrimps she had put in.

Carefully, Tonks dipped a finger in the stuff and tasted it. To her surprise it didn't taste as bad as it looked. A bit salty, but otherwise quite edible. If only it wouldn't be such a disgusting shade of grey...

One look at the charmed pink room-divider brought the solution.

A moment later Tonks stared contentedly at the two desert-glasses filled to the brim with a soft salmon-pink 'mousse', which looked light and creamy and, she thought proudly, quite tasty.

From a begonia sitting in a pot at the windowsill she took some green leaves to put on top of the mousse as garnish. It gave the dish a kind of sophisticated appearance.

Immensely relieved and pleased at her handling of the crisis, Tonks took the glasses into the kitchen and served them in front of a stunned looking Remus.

* * *

Liked it? Let me know!

love, Zimra


	6. Chapter 6

Hi everyone,

a fresh chapter to enjoy! It turned out a bit more fluffy than i intended to, but it's alright...

people (like myself) can use a bit of fluff every once in a while, it helps with the stress ;)

take care, and pleeeeease review!!!!!!!!!!

ps. oh, i rated it a bit higher just to be on the safe side, but i't really nothing serious.

* * *

Chapter 6

Dinner had been fabulous.

The shrimp-mousse tasted good with large chunks of bread that Remus had conjured out of thin air. The candles had given the basement kitchen exactly the right romantic atmosphere and during the evening Tonks felt her own dark eyes more and more frequently locked into Remus' grey ones. They talked about a million things and nothing at the same time. It felt so good, so right, to sit there in that kitchen and talk. She couldn't remember she'd ever felt so comfortable and relaxed, and silently Tonks had wished they could sit there forever.

Remus had found it hard to keep his eyes off the sparkling young witch in front of him. His whole being felt mesmerised by the look of her dark eyes, pale skin, bright pink hair...

The old list of reasons why they couldn't be together – too poor, too old, too dangerous - had always been playing in his head, like a nagging song, whenever he saw her. But tonight it had slowly faded away in the mysterious magic of the evening.

His right hand that was lying on the table seemed to have a life of its own, as it crept towards hers. It felt small and warm and their fingers intertwined themselves automatically.

The touch of his rough fingertips sent shivers through Tonks' body. Suddenly she felt nervous, just like at the beginning of the evening when she had wolfed down her shrimp-mousse and bread out of pure nerves. She had only calmed down after Remus seemed to like the food and she was convinced that he was enjoying himself. Not wanting to show her fresh burst of nerves she took another sip of her wine. When she put her goblet down she was Remus staring at her. She stared back and in his pale grey eyes she saw her own hope, her own longing reflected and the same hunger she felt.

Only moments later a goblet clattered on the table and their lips met.

A little voice in the back of Tonks' head thanked Molly for her brilliant idea. (Which she found kinda odd, because how could she think about Molly while she was kissing the one and only man of her dreams?)

After a generous measure of seconds (or days, or weeks, or months as far as Tonks was concerned) they broke apart. Both stared at the wine that had spread itself on the table and was now dripping on the floor. Remus stood up and moved to get a cloth from behind the room divider. Tonks mind came down from cloud nine just fast enough to beat him to it and get the cloth before he saw anything of the still remaining mess behind the divider.

Together they mopped up the wine and when Remus' shoulder brushed her upper-arm Tonks suddenly felt faint. While she leant on the table for support she was actually surprised at the strong physical effect this man seemed to have on her.

"You ok?" His voice sounded harsh and warm at the same time.

She just nodded.

His arms encircled her waist and she leant towards him while the feeling passed. He pressed a light kiss on her lips, not as long as the first one, but still delightful. Then he looked at her, suddenly very serious.

"Shall we, you know... take this slow?"

She nodded again. Slow was good. They would take time to know eachother, let their relationship grow, or whatever kind of terms they used in the magazines.

His eyes had a hint of nervousness in them, like a schoolboy worried he'll screw the whole thing up. And in a moment she understood that this was, because he was serious about them. She understood what a big step this was for him: to love and be loved back was probably something he'd never done before.

"Yes, we'll take it slowly."

They kissed again.

_Just not too slowly_. Tonks thought to herself.

* * *

Liked it? PLEASE review!!!

love, Zimra


	7. Chapter 7

Hi everyone,

sorry it took SUCH a long time to update, i've just been too busy with school to write. But now that i have vacation... i'm planning on finishing this story very soon, hopefully before the next harry potter book comes out.

Hope you like the new chapter, and please review!

* * *

A Brilliant Idea

Chapter 7

_We are SO meant to be, it's really uncanny, _Tonks mused while laying sprawled on the couch with her head against Remus' chest and his arm draped around her waist.

No, nothing spicy had happened! (Yet...) They had merely played a game of chess, which seemed highly romantic all of a sudden, and then had stretched themselves on the couch and watched the fire. Remus' breath had already become deep and regular and soon Tonks felt herself dozing off.

8888888888888888888888888888888888

When she opened her eyes again, the fire had dimmed to a glow. Remus' breathing still felt steady under her head.

Her stomach felt weird.

_So all the talk about butterflies wasn't a metaphor then? _

She felt Remus' sleeping form next to her and the relaxed weight of his arm around her.

An overwhelming feeling came upon her.

_This must be real love_, she thought, and planned to remember this moment for the rest of her life. Later she would tell her grandchildren about that night that she realised she loved their granddad.

After a moment, however, she decided that the feeling wasn't so great. Actually quite the contrary.

All of a sudden she felt extremely nauseous, her stomach roiling and lurching unpleasantly.

_Ok, so much for the butterflies..._ Well she had always thought of that as being bullshit...

Tonks nervously tried to shift her body out from under Remus' heavy arm. She tried as gently as possible, not wanting to wake him up.

Why on earth did she had to cook seafood? The thought of it, of any food at all, made her feel like she would throw up.

Finally she had herself pried out from under Remus' arm and stood up from the couch. On shaky legs Tonks made her way to the bathroom where she gripped the sink to keep her balance and stared at herself in the mirror. The skin of her face looked sickly pale, her dark eyes and bright hair making her complexion stand out even more. She certainly felt as bad as she looked. With trembling hands she opened the tap and splashed some water in her face. It didn't help.

Tonks felt her stomach cramp and the bile rising in her throat. Quickly she leant over the toilet and threw up. _Uhrg... those shrimps tasted horrible on the way back,_ she mused and promptly threw up another wave of... well: 'shrimp mouse'. To make matters worse it looked still the same as when she had eaten it: pinkish. Eew.

Even though she was no longer vomiting Tonks was still leaning over the toilet. She couldn't remember she'd ever felt more miserable in her life. She was dizzy, an acrid taste lingered in her mouth and she still felt so nauseous she wasn't sure if she was going to throw up again.

As the bathroom spun around her she lowered herself onto her knees, gripping the toilet-bowl for support.

_Great, just when I managed to have a real date, in a sort of grown-up romantic way, I poison myself with shrimps. _

Dark spots danced before her eyes and she heard a voice from far away call her name.

_This is it. I'm dying. I only had a chance to kiss Remus once and now I die. Just my luck. _

The voice became louder. "Nymphadora, are you there?"

The voice sounded like Remus. Maybe an angel-version of Remus, who came to get her now that she was dying. He would take her hand and together they would walk through the gates of heaven...

"Nymphadora, are you ok? If you don't answer in ten seconds I'm coming in!"

_Oh. Well, maybe I'm not dead yet. _

Being too woozy to respond, Tonks faintly heard Remus count to ten. The door opened and seconds later she felt his hand on her back. Just then, a fresh wave of nausea shook her and she leaned over the toilet.

Tonks thought she would die of embarrassment as she kept spluttering and retching, occasionally bringing up some bile, while Remus stroked her back in comforting circles. When the heaving finally stopped she realised, to her own frustration, that tears where streaming down her face. She felt Remus' hand leave her back and didn't dare to look up. A sob escaped her.

Remus kneeled next to her with a glass of water.

"Hey, feeling a bit better now?"

Tonks nodded feebly. She looked up and found Remus' face just inches from hers. From here she could see the thin lines around his eyes, and grey paleness of his skin.

What had she done? She loved this man and yet she had been trying the whole night to deceive him. She lied to him, tried to impress him, she had been trying to make herself look better... Did she really think that cooking a fancy dinner would make him fall in love with her? Wasn't there a rule that said that you should never lie to the ones you love?

"Eh, Remus? About tonight,..."

"Shh, don't worry about it. Happens to anybody one time or another."

"No, I mean I..." saying it was harder than she thought.

"Do you need some more water? Or are you gonna be sick again?"

"No, it's- " O_h please not again_, she thought as her stomach cramped once more. "I mean: yes", she moaned and then was hunched over the toilet again.

She felt Remus dab her forehead and neck with the moistened corner of a towel, she felt him hold her hair back and securing it with a rubber he'd apparently summoned from somewhere. She even felt him helping her stand up from her kneeling position on the bathroom-floor and allowed him to guide her back to the living-room and onto the couch.

"The shrimps..." she tried to continue her confession to him but the words came out as a weak mumble. "I did..., they weren't..."

"They probably weren't fresh enough. It's not your fault, Nymphadora, they should have sold you a better quality."

"No, but I..."

"I'll make you some tea to settle your stomach. Feel like I could do with a cup myself."

He stood up and she noticed the sweatdrops on his forehead. He looked just as awful as she felt.

Then she was left alone to stare in the glowing embers.

_Congratulations Nymphadora! Only you could turn a nice romantic evening into such a horrible disaster! Cooking shrimps, what where you thinking!? _

Now that she thought of it: maybe you weren't supposed to eat shrimps raw? Hmm, she should have thought about that sooner... And hang on, somewhere far back in her head she heard her mothers voice telling her about how to keep the fresh stuff you bought refrigerated until you used it... Before her minds' eye appeared an image of a bowl full of raw shrimps, standing on the kitchen table all afternoon...

Yes, she had most certainly poisoned both of them.

* * *

Like it? Hate it? Let me know!

love, Zimra.


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